It’s Not a Rumah Terbuka — It’s My Pantang Period

So you’ve just brought a tiny human into the world. Your perineum is still filing damage reports, your boobs are leaking like a busted pipe in Penampang, and you’re bleeding enough to make a CSI crew nervous. The only thing keeping you upright is minyak urut, warm soup, and sheer stubbornness.

Then — knock knock — aunty, uncle, sepupu dari Papar, and their three kids (hands sticky from God-knows-what) arrive to “tengok baby”.

Sis.

This is not a kenduri. This is confinement. And you are not the catering committee.

Why Dropping By “Sekejap” Is Not Helping

“Kami datang tengok baby bah, sekejap saja…”Translation: We’re here to wake the baby, talk loudly, and casually comment on your hips.

Look, the baby is not leaving for university next week. There’s plenty of time for cuddles later. Right now, I’m sitting on a donut pillow in mesh underwear, sipping jamu that tastes like a slipper. Let’s give it a minute.

And yes, the baby socks are cute. But the unannounced visit? Not so much.

Pantang Has a Purpose

Pantang is about:

• Rest — because your body just did a marathon with stitches.

• Recovery — physically, emotionally, hormonally.

• Rebooting sanity — which is hard with a living room full of guests.

If that means locking the gate and pretending I’m not home? I will, happily.

Boundaries Keep Everyone Happy

“Eh dia ni garang o baru beranak sudah sombong". No, not sombong — just protecting my mental health (and my stitches).

Want to help? Send food. Wash the dishes. Entertain the older kids. What not to do? Park yourself in my living room asking “Eh belum mandi lagi kah?”

Final Word (With Love, But Also Boundaries)

If you wouldn’t show up uninvited to someone’s hospital bed after surgery, don’t do it during pantang. Love the mum, respect the space, and the baby will still be there when it’s time.